Below The Fold

Watching Chris run back and forth across the stage while singing Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher.” I still can’t stop laughing.

Skid’s rendition of Sweet Caroline. Especially the rap part. Yes, there is a rap part. At least there was last night.

Zeb’s “All you white people are crazy” face. Seriously. I can’t begin to describe it adequately enough. It’s kind of like that moment in Crimson Tide when Denzel realizes Hackman’s not going to back down. Except it was in a strip mall Metal bar instead of a submarine.

Amy’s no-rhythm dance.

The part where Danny screamed, “Dick Cheney can suck my dick!!” and Robert responded with, “That’s a really strange crush.” (okay, that happened the night before, but it was too funny not to be included.)

The chick with one of the largest racks I’ve ever seen hitting all over Thomas after he sang “What did you Think” by Billy Vera and the Beaters and trying to convince him to come home with her and her friend. And then Thomas turning to me and asking if I thought my brother-in-law would be his “Chubby chaser partner.”

Callie’s expression when she was told drinks were free for the ladies for the night.

Callie’s booty dance during the requisite Sir-Mixx-a-Lot moment of the evening. This happened several hours after Callie was told drinks were free for the ladies for the night.

Ben’s perfect performance of “Easy” by Lionel Richie. Especially the part where Amy and Callie got on stage and started dancing like the Four Tops behind him and the DJ kicked on the strobe lights and smoke machines. Brilliance.

The girl who REALLY liked Tommy’s Ozzy impression. REALLY, REALLY, REALLY liked it.

Singing Elvis’ “In The Ghetto” after dedicating it to “My life partner, Thomas.” Interracial gay relationships always go over big in the A-Town.

Synge’s take on Jet’s “Are You Gonna Be My Girl,” while Amy sat in the bar stool directly in front of the stage and the two college girls did the “I’m-gonna-turn-all-the-guys-in-the-room-on-with-our-suggestive-lipstick-lesbian-grinding” right behind her, a la the scab-strippers-turned-cheerleaders in The Replacements. I could have scored, like, four touchdowns in the bar during that song.