Below The Fold

Update
I just spent the last hour surfing a site called Multiple Sclerosis Sucks from a link off of the Broad’s website. The advent of the Internet is a marvelous thing, you know. It at once allows enough access to completely gain or obliterate all sense of perspective. It really is a miasma of differences [...]

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Damn the Bells
I woke up Sunday morning and my face didn’t work.
Actually, it was half my face. The left half.
It was, bar none, the strangest thing that has ever happened to me.
The affliction is called Bell’s Palsy. Both my dentist and doctor agree it was most likely an infected molar that created enough swelling to [...]

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“Thank you for calling Chili’s, Malpyou?”
“Yes, I’d like to place an order for carryout.”
“Hang on.”
three minutes later
“Thank you for calling Chili’s, Malpyou?”
“Yes, I’d like to place an order for carryout.”
“Whattdya want?”
“I’d like to order a guiltless chicken platter and Chedderburger, please.”
“How’d you like the burger cooked?”
“Medium rare, please.”
“We only do medium.”
“… I’m sorry?”
“We only cook [...]

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